Recently noted around Delhi – II

R

First of all I solemnly declare that I really did like Watchmen. Decent story, nice snarky sense of humour all over the place and lots of things, like costumes and guns, for little boys to gush over. Also heroine in latex suit. And heroine out of latex suit.

But also I had the chance to laugh verily at that oft-overlooked barometer of the social zeitgeist. (No idea. Just sounds cool.) The customer service feedback book.

Once you’ve done many weekends of women’s clothing shopping with the missus, as I have, you learn to, discreetly of course, find other things to amuse you. And within the sterile enviornment of our malls and department stores this is no mean feat. So I end up hanging around reading the vision statements of retailing companies, memorizing the US-European-UK-Asia-Klingon size conversion charts for shoes and internalizing material on why the design irregularities in Fabindia merchandise celebrate the eccentricity of handmade production.

And sometimes I go to the LCD/Plasma TV department, where they have all the TVs wired to the same DVD player. If you stand facing the huge display wall and then the image on the TV’s suddenly flip to one side, like in an external shot of a passenger jet, you get this awesome dizzy feeling. Try it. Don’t throw up.

And then a couple of years ago, at a W store, I discovered the customer feedback book and stood at the cash counter reading it cover to cover. It was freaking awesome. Seriously, somebody should publish one of those.

Sure most of it is just the usual "SMS when there is sale" and "Customer service is good, but price is slightly high" variety. But every once in a while there will be this awesome gem of humour or human frailty that cracks me up.

Ever since then I always make it a point to flip through these feedback books whenever I can.

So imagine my glee when I discover one at PVR Saket. It was just lying there by the popcorn counter, unloved and covered in mysterious sticky patches. With hajaar time to go before the 11:10 PM show, the missus and I began to flip through the book. There weren’t many entries. Someone from the staff had ripped off a good one-third of the book from the front. But the dozen or so pages left had plenty to think about. I present a few choice, mildly amusing pickings in the form of blurry BlackBerry photos and associated transcripts:

No. 1:

Okay making fun of someone’s English is a little below the belt. But come on. If you can spell ‘ambience’ you should be able to spell ‘great’ too right?

Text: ‘Grat service, ambience is very good.’ Yup. Cheap shot.

No. 2:

Some customers can be very choosy indeed you know. For instance, a few insist that the staff maintain the highest standards of personal hygiene.

Text:  ‘clean, friendly staff’

No. 3:


Don’t you just hate those movies that simply refuse to get along with you? They just refuse to listen to reason.

Text: ‘Nice place, reasonable movies, seating needs to be more comfortable.’

No. 4:

pvr4 

The best customers are those who leave clear, actionable feedback right? Right? Then these are the worshtest ever.

Text: ‘Its a fun place to hangout with friends!!’ Followed by ‘same’ and ‘same’. Thanks a lot!

No. 5:

pvr5 

This one is without doubt my favourite.

Text: ‘It is a beautiful and romantic place for 3 guys.’

Don’t ask me. I just report it as it is.

(P.S. Big scale blog redesign is being contemplated. We might post less frequently than usual because of that. Heh heh. Ayyo.)

And now before you go please contemplate donating for a good cause. Choose from one of the many certified NGO’s at GiveIndia.

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44 Comments

  • This is hilarious. try sign-boards, pamphlets and poster. They are even more funny. Newspapers aren't far behind – and i think that is where it gets interesting. English dailies with grat error! 😛

  • any plans of a similar post on Menu cards?
    @redesign -no offence, yahoo… much needed!
    😛

  • Grat work. I hope redesign will not change ambianse of blog…

    stretching it I know but I was hoping to please with consistent misspelling.

    • You have pleased! The redesign will make the home page more busier. With more sort oof streams of content. In addition to pure blog posts. So people have more things to do. Less sidebar clutter. And so on. But it will still be orange, pale orange, warm and homey.

  • Humph! Except for the “romantic place for 3 guys” didn’t get the humor in other messages. Maybe my expectations of Sidin the great are higher, maybe the post was a bit insipid 🙁 And how much more infrequent can you get than this saar! 🙁 🙁 🙁 Some readers miss you, you know (Silently sobs now)

  • “romantic place for 3 guys” stands out of the rest.
    I tried making myself laugh for the other ones, my humor sense is like “Get a life, Mate”.. 😉

    Come on Sidin, you have better humor sense than this anyday…

  • u shd read the comments in food services. for eg. dominos

    the place had a diary full of stuff which had been written mostly by the staff themselves!
    yes, i did a complete analysis once when I had to write a complaint. The handwriting analyst in me also speaketh.

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By sidin

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